It's been a year since we've made the move back to Texas. We've adjusted fairly well to living in a small community and love being closer to The Children and The Grands.
With all of that I must confess that I miss my Oklahoma place. We were at the end of the road in our subdivision. We were on an acre with trees and a special garden place. This time of year flowers (mostly lilies and golden daffodils) were blooming all around the yard. There was lavender in the front flower bed that smelled glorious. It's also time for the birds to be coming back from their southern homes. Bright noisy blue jays, sleek blue birds, and the regal cardinals with their unusual tweets. And, of course, my woodpecker who tapped on the telephone pole every morning in the lot north of us. It was quiet and secluded, and I loved it.
And, I miss it. I've been talking to Jesus about it the last two weeks. Not complaining, but with a tinge of sadness in my heart. Just telling him that it seems like such a small thing, but the longing is intense. And, there are more important things to miss, yes?
And then this morning as I was sitting at the computer, a movement out the window caught my attention. And I looked, and what I saw took my breath away. There in the still barren crepe myrtle was a beautiful, red cardinal, and his mate with her tawny red feathers and orange beak. The most beautiful gift. Just for me. What a sweet, sweet blessing. Thank you Jesus. For knowing. For caring about the small things.
Wednesday, March 19, 2014
Tuesday, March 4, 2014
Whew!
Hi everyone! I've missed my blog. Truly. I think I would share more if I didn't seem to think it had to be deep and long..... wait! Isn't there a song? Hahaha. I've recently become even more certain that I have adult-onset of ADHD. (and yes, I really know there's no such thing)
As I was cleaning yesterday, trying desperately to get back into some sort of routine, I was also listening to Numbers. I have discovered that I retain or think more about something when I hear it rather than just reading it. Anyway, as I was listening it dawned on me that following the law of the Old Testament is just plain old wearisome. And difficult. And impossible. Have you really paid attention to any of the rules and rituals required for the offerings? And how many different kinds of offerings there were? And there were even offerings for accidental sins? I would have never been able to keep up! I would have never been able to stand before a holy God.
And then Paul comes along in the New Testament and informs us that the reason for the law was so we would KNOW we can't stand before a holy God. Jesus was the perfect sacrifice, who covers all our sin, whose righteousness we wear before a holy God. I don't know about you, but I'm relieved.
By Grace Alone . . .
Whew!
As I was cleaning yesterday, trying desperately to get back into some sort of routine, I was also listening to Numbers. I have discovered that I retain or think more about something when I hear it rather than just reading it. Anyway, as I was listening it dawned on me that following the law of the Old Testament is just plain old wearisome. And difficult. And impossible. Have you really paid attention to any of the rules and rituals required for the offerings? And how many different kinds of offerings there were? And there were even offerings for accidental sins? I would have never been able to keep up! I would have never been able to stand before a holy God.
And then Paul comes along in the New Testament and informs us that the reason for the law was so we would KNOW we can't stand before a holy God. Jesus was the perfect sacrifice, who covers all our sin, whose righteousness we wear before a holy God. I don't know about you, but I'm relieved.
By Grace Alone . . .
Whew!
Monday, November 11, 2013
When Obedience Hurts
It may just be too soon to write this post. There hasn't been much time to really process the events which have unfolded in the last two weeks. Time hasn't passed so that we can look at it from a future perspective and see how God used it to mold us and to trust Him more. But I think I have to write about it now, while the pain, the anger, the shock, the confusion, and the million other emotions that all hit at once are still reeling in our hearts and minds. And I have to do it in a way that doesn't give any details - because the consequences are still settling and will be for a long time.
Suffice it to say that there was a group who were being faithful to the call God had placed on their lives. Difficult things were happening, and it would be very easy to go with the crowd rather than stand on principles found in the Word of God. But this group didn't relent. They stood firm. They stood for truth and for honor. They did what God's word taught and instructed them to do. But it didn't work out the way they thought it would. It seems to have ended horribly wrong. Shock, bewilderment, doubt, and despair have all come into play. And the hard questions have been asked, but none have been answered satisfactorily.
And I can't answer them either. But, I do know that God is sovereign and in control. He knew all of this would happen just exactly as it has. He knew many would be devastated by these events. He knew those who were being obedient would wonder (and will) what they did wrong or what they might have done differently. And He will remind them they did exactly as He asked them to do.
David was obedient in not harming Saul when given the opportunity to do so, even though Saul was trying to kill him. Elijah was faithful to God in asking for fire from heaven to destroy the offering of Baal's priests and then fell into a deep depression and asked God to take his life. John the Baptist was faithful to rebuke the king for his immoral behavior and ended up with his head on a platter. Jesus was obedient to death, even to death on a cross.
Obedience can hurt. Perhaps you've been there. Many people I love and care for are there now, and it's hard. Praying for peace and wisdom upon each one of them.
1 Samuel 15:22 And Samuel said, "Has the Lord as great delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices, as in obeying the voice of the Lord? Behold, to obey is better than sacrifice, and to listen than the fat of rams . . ."
Suffice it to say that there was a group who were being faithful to the call God had placed on their lives. Difficult things were happening, and it would be very easy to go with the crowd rather than stand on principles found in the Word of God. But this group didn't relent. They stood firm. They stood for truth and for honor. They did what God's word taught and instructed them to do. But it didn't work out the way they thought it would. It seems to have ended horribly wrong. Shock, bewilderment, doubt, and despair have all come into play. And the hard questions have been asked, but none have been answered satisfactorily.
And I can't answer them either. But, I do know that God is sovereign and in control. He knew all of this would happen just exactly as it has. He knew many would be devastated by these events. He knew those who were being obedient would wonder (and will) what they did wrong or what they might have done differently. And He will remind them they did exactly as He asked them to do.
David was obedient in not harming Saul when given the opportunity to do so, even though Saul was trying to kill him. Elijah was faithful to God in asking for fire from heaven to destroy the offering of Baal's priests and then fell into a deep depression and asked God to take his life. John the Baptist was faithful to rebuke the king for his immoral behavior and ended up with his head on a platter. Jesus was obedient to death, even to death on a cross.
Obedience can hurt. Perhaps you've been there. Many people I love and care for are there now, and it's hard. Praying for peace and wisdom upon each one of them.
1 Samuel 15:22 And Samuel said, "Has the Lord as great delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices, as in obeying the voice of the Lord? Behold, to obey is better than sacrifice, and to listen than the fat of rams . . ."
Monday, November 4, 2013
God's Faithfulness
I've been away for a very long time -- well over a year. I'm not sure what happened, it just seemed there was nothing to say. There have been times during the absence when I should have written but just couldn't make it happen. But God's been poking at me recently, letting me know it's time to begin again. So here we go . . .
Last week I was able to spend a whole week at a resort in Holly Lake Ranch in East Texas. Oklahoma people make fun of us Texas people because of how we distinguish different parts of the state. But we have to, do you know how BIG Texas is? Have mercy. Oops, I digress. Anyway, Michael drove me down Saturday afternoon (even though I was sick as a dog) and left Sunday afternoon. My friends were coming in late Wednesday, but for two whole days, nearly three, I was alone. Time for a little thinking and lots of heart to heart talks with Jesus.
Paula and Kathy arrived late Wednesday night. They brought food. This made me happy. It had rained all day on Wednesday. I love the rain, especially when in such a beautiful place. Paula and Kathy weren't nearly as impressed. They drove in it all day and then in the dark. We have been friends for at least 25 years. We don't see each other nearly enough, but God had arranged this meeting, and we took advantage of it.
Thursday night we got to talking about all those years. We were trying to remember just when our friendship started and how. I'm not sure we ever put it down to the time, but Kathy seems to think the moment was when we skipped out on an event planned by the beautiful June Bingham. We stayed for most of it, but at some point the whole of us were going to another place and somehow we three decided to strike out on our own. Poor Mrs. Bingham. I marvel that she didn't pinch our heads off.
In the course of that conversation (which lasted until three in the morning) we learned things about one another that we had never known before. Imagine that! We clarified some events of long ago. We remembered the past. And I must confess, there are painful times in our past. Times where we were in deep despair with no hope. Times when we were walking blind, or walking wounded, or walking and talking when we should have been walking and keeping silent. We went through times with our marriages, with our kids, with our friends, and with our church that we thought we would't live through. We discussed and rehashed those times that night. The pain became real again, the sorrow was deep again, and emotions were raw. It was an amazing night.
But as we talked we each noticed the same things. There was no anger or bitterness in our souls at the people involved, the events that had occurred, or even at God who had allowed all things to transpire. We were each struck by the fact that God had remained faithful throughout the years. We each realized that He had held us in the palm of His hand and loved on us when we thought we were surely going to die from the pain that was in our world. He didn't let us go, He didn't let us become bitter, He allowed us to continue to love, pray for, and feel sorrow for all those people who wronged us. (and yes, those people who we wronged as well)
I try hard to not live in the past. I also know that sometimes you need to be reminded of the past just so you can remember the story of how God led you through different events in your world. Any one of those events could have destroyed us had we let it. Each one of those events have become a stepping stone to the relationship we now have with our heavenly Father. He's amazing, this God we serve. And He's faithful, and I needed to be reminded.
Joshua 4:20-24: And those twelve stones, which they took out of the Jordan, Joshua set up at Gilgal. And he said to the people of Israel, "When your children ask their father in times to come, 'What do these stones mean?' then you shall let your children know, 'Israel passed over this Jordan on dry ground.' For the Lord your God dried up the waters of the Jordan for you until you passed over; as the Lord your God did to the Red Sea, which he dried up for us until we passed over, so that all the peoples of the earth may know that the hand of the Lord is mighty, that you may fear the Lord your God forever."
Last week I was able to spend a whole week at a resort in Holly Lake Ranch in East Texas. Oklahoma people make fun of us Texas people because of how we distinguish different parts of the state. But we have to, do you know how BIG Texas is? Have mercy. Oops, I digress. Anyway, Michael drove me down Saturday afternoon (even though I was sick as a dog) and left Sunday afternoon. My friends were coming in late Wednesday, but for two whole days, nearly three, I was alone. Time for a little thinking and lots of heart to heart talks with Jesus.
Paula and Kathy arrived late Wednesday night. They brought food. This made me happy. It had rained all day on Wednesday. I love the rain, especially when in such a beautiful place. Paula and Kathy weren't nearly as impressed. They drove in it all day and then in the dark. We have been friends for at least 25 years. We don't see each other nearly enough, but God had arranged this meeting, and we took advantage of it.
Thursday night we got to talking about all those years. We were trying to remember just when our friendship started and how. I'm not sure we ever put it down to the time, but Kathy seems to think the moment was when we skipped out on an event planned by the beautiful June Bingham. We stayed for most of it, but at some point the whole of us were going to another place and somehow we three decided to strike out on our own. Poor Mrs. Bingham. I marvel that she didn't pinch our heads off.
In the course of that conversation (which lasted until three in the morning) we learned things about one another that we had never known before. Imagine that! We clarified some events of long ago. We remembered the past. And I must confess, there are painful times in our past. Times where we were in deep despair with no hope. Times when we were walking blind, or walking wounded, or walking and talking when we should have been walking and keeping silent. We went through times with our marriages, with our kids, with our friends, and with our church that we thought we would't live through. We discussed and rehashed those times that night. The pain became real again, the sorrow was deep again, and emotions were raw. It was an amazing night.
But as we talked we each noticed the same things. There was no anger or bitterness in our souls at the people involved, the events that had occurred, or even at God who had allowed all things to transpire. We were each struck by the fact that God had remained faithful throughout the years. We each realized that He had held us in the palm of His hand and loved on us when we thought we were surely going to die from the pain that was in our world. He didn't let us go, He didn't let us become bitter, He allowed us to continue to love, pray for, and feel sorrow for all those people who wronged us. (and yes, those people who we wronged as well)
I try hard to not live in the past. I also know that sometimes you need to be reminded of the past just so you can remember the story of how God led you through different events in your world. Any one of those events could have destroyed us had we let it. Each one of those events have become a stepping stone to the relationship we now have with our heavenly Father. He's amazing, this God we serve. And He's faithful, and I needed to be reminded.
Joshua 4:20-24: And those twelve stones, which they took out of the Jordan, Joshua set up at Gilgal. And he said to the people of Israel, "When your children ask their father in times to come, 'What do these stones mean?' then you shall let your children know, 'Israel passed over this Jordan on dry ground.' For the Lord your God dried up the waters of the Jordan for you until you passed over; as the Lord your God did to the Red Sea, which he dried up for us until we passed over, so that all the peoples of the earth may know that the hand of the Lord is mighty, that you may fear the Lord your God forever."
Thursday, July 5, 2012
Listening . . .
After the month of June, I again remember why God gives us children when we're young. And yes, there's definitely a physical aspect to it, but the mental aspect is just as tough. Being consistent, choosing your battles, being one step ahead . . . lots of things to consider and to be on top of.
Something that really struck me while our two little guys were here is the art of listening. Kayden does everything at top speed, including talking. After asking him to repeat himself on several occasions, Kristi and I would often look at one another and just shrug our shoulders. We didn't get it. Alas. We could hear, but we couldn't understand.
Another thing I noticed was that the boys would be so involved in whatever they were doing they couldn't hear us. Well, they could hear us, they just weren't listening. Many times we had to ask them, "Are you listening to me?" Other times we would physically touch their face and ask them to look at our eyes so we might communicate. We had to get their undivided attention (if that's even possible with 2-year-olds). There were only a few times when they were actually not wanting to listen, mostly they were just busy and didn't want to stop their current activity.
It reminds me that I do the same thing with God. I get so wrapped up in whatever the day brings, that I sometimes forget to listen. I hear, but I don't listen. And sometimes the Holy Spirit will prod a little harder, "Are you listening?" And I don't. And then, God will reach down and touch me in order to get my undivided attention. And it's not because I'm being stubborn or defiant, it's just because I'm too busy, and I don't want to stop what I'm doing.
And then this morning as I'm working through 1 Kings I have to do a word study on understanding, discern, and wise. Two of them are used in this context as verbs. Guess what they mean. Yep. "To hear, to listen closely, consider carefully, perceives by ear, to hear intelligently, perceives with the senses, etc."
Hope you take time to LISTEN today. Isn't God amazing?
Something that really struck me while our two little guys were here is the art of listening. Kayden does everything at top speed, including talking. After asking him to repeat himself on several occasions, Kristi and I would often look at one another and just shrug our shoulders. We didn't get it. Alas. We could hear, but we couldn't understand.
Another thing I noticed was that the boys would be so involved in whatever they were doing they couldn't hear us. Well, they could hear us, they just weren't listening. Many times we had to ask them, "Are you listening to me?" Other times we would physically touch their face and ask them to look at our eyes so we might communicate. We had to get their undivided attention (if that's even possible with 2-year-olds). There were only a few times when they were actually not wanting to listen, mostly they were just busy and didn't want to stop their current activity.
It reminds me that I do the same thing with God. I get so wrapped up in whatever the day brings, that I sometimes forget to listen. I hear, but I don't listen. And sometimes the Holy Spirit will prod a little harder, "Are you listening?" And I don't. And then, God will reach down and touch me in order to get my undivided attention. And it's not because I'm being stubborn or defiant, it's just because I'm too busy, and I don't want to stop what I'm doing.
And then this morning as I'm working through 1 Kings I have to do a word study on understanding, discern, and wise. Two of them are used in this context as verbs. Guess what they mean. Yep. "To hear, to listen closely, consider carefully, perceives by ear, to hear intelligently, perceives with the senses, etc."
Hope you take time to LISTEN today. Isn't God amazing?
Wednesday, June 20, 2012
Are YOU Inerrant???
Lots of things have been trolling through my brain lately. They all seemed to culminate Sunday. Yes, Sunday, as in Father's Day. I was doing okay until I talked to my cousin. And then, well, suffice it to say that I wasn't doing too well. Dad taught us lots of important things. I'd like to share one.
While working as a Foster Home Developer one of the main questions I got was, 'What makes good foster parents?' After answering the question a million different ways it finally dawned on me that to be a good foster parent - you couldn't have all the answers. Does that surprise you? The best thing you can do as a foster parent is be willing to learn - be teachable. Every child is unique. Every circumstance is unique. What worked for you and your birth children may not work for your foster children. And, what works today may not work tomorrow. The relationship changes. If you're not willing to learn new ideas, consider new approaches, stretch yourself a lot, adapt as you go, then fostering is not for you. Teach-ability and flexibility are two of the most important attributes in fostering.
Dad was a lifelong learner. I don't know of many 70+ year-old men who can take apart a computer and put it back together. Dad worked several years for Microsoft as a merchandiser. He had to know how to use all those little gadgets. He had to show adults and children how to use the gaming machines and around Christmas he usually sold a bunch of them. As an avid reader he was up to date on the latest authors and best sellers. He liked Harry Potter and The Lord of the Rings. He liked good mysteries, science-fiction, and fantasy. He always had crossword puzzle books going and also worked the puzzles in the paper. He never looked in the back for the answers either. (I do.) Other than the spiritual legacy Dad left, I think the most important thing he taught all of us is that you're never too old to learn, and you SHOULD continue to do so.
A couple of weeks ago one of our elders brought the morning message. One of the questions he asked was whether or not you had ever changed your mind about a biblical truth or passage. Or, have you believed the very same thing since your salvation? What a great question! Have you ever debated with someone over specific passages of scripture and come away with a different perspective or insight? As a student/facilitator of Precept studies I most certainly have. I remember well a concept I had held for decades that was changed in me as I studied word for word the book of Romans. And now, when friends are so adamant about that concept around me, I kinda grin and think, some day, God may change your mind about that. The elder pointed out the fact that God is inerrant -- we are not!
God's mercies are new every morning. If we are teachable and flexible His lessons and insights for us are also new every morning. What are you allowing Him to teach you this week?
Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. ~Lamentations 3:22-23
Friday, May 4, 2012
Struggling and Provision
Can I just confess that it's been a really tough week? I've struggled with grief, sorrow, anger, doubt, fear, regret, and to top it all off - laziness. Tuesday was so hard I could hardly stand it. As Michael read our nightly devotion the tears flowed, but I didn't want him to know because I couldn't explain them. Of course it's kind of hard to hide tears when you use 15 tissues in five minutes or something. Alas.
While I've struggled this week God has been sweet. In both Bible studies that I'm currently engaged in He has spoken. In Daniel we learn in all things God is sovereign. And we see that all through scripture He tells His people what He's going to do. Did you know that according to Daniel if the religious leaders had been paying attention to dates alone they would have known that Jesus was their Messiah when he rode into Jerusalem on the colt of the donkey? Isn't that amazing? And even now He tells us through His prophets what's coming in the future. He's given us a heads up.
Yesterday He spoke in another way. I was playing catch-up with the other study last night. In it the author, Kelly Minter, tells of going to a guitar sale where the man selling them had never even opened the cases -- much less played them. Expensive guitars. Like more than I would pay for a car guitars. Kelly likened that to us having gifts from God yet never opening them. Pretty interesting thoughts. I'll let you ponder those in your own life.
She also talked about provision. How God always makes provision for our needs and for what He's called us to do. Remember Abraham and Isaac? And remember how God called Abraham to go and sacrifice Isaac? And how Isaac asked his Dad where the lamb was? And Abraham answered him, 'God will provide.' And He did. We see in a few verses down that God provided a ram whose horns were caught in the thicket.
So God is sovereign, and God has provision. The weight of this week has been oppressive, but I know that God is in control and He will provide. Last night He sent me to Psalm 116. Yes, I cried, and no, the weight didn't go away. But I know that He is sovereign, that He will provide, and that He is right here with me as I struggle.
"I love the Lord, because He has heard my voice and my pleas for mercy. Because He inclined His hear to me, therefore I will call on Him as long as I live." ~Psalm 116:1-2
"The counsel of the Lord stands forever, the plans of His heart to all generations." ~Psalm 33:11
While I've struggled this week God has been sweet. In both Bible studies that I'm currently engaged in He has spoken. In Daniel we learn in all things God is sovereign. And we see that all through scripture He tells His people what He's going to do. Did you know that according to Daniel if the religious leaders had been paying attention to dates alone they would have known that Jesus was their Messiah when he rode into Jerusalem on the colt of the donkey? Isn't that amazing? And even now He tells us through His prophets what's coming in the future. He's given us a heads up.
Yesterday He spoke in another way. I was playing catch-up with the other study last night. In it the author, Kelly Minter, tells of going to a guitar sale where the man selling them had never even opened the cases -- much less played them. Expensive guitars. Like more than I would pay for a car guitars. Kelly likened that to us having gifts from God yet never opening them. Pretty interesting thoughts. I'll let you ponder those in your own life.
She also talked about provision. How God always makes provision for our needs and for what He's called us to do. Remember Abraham and Isaac? And remember how God called Abraham to go and sacrifice Isaac? And how Isaac asked his Dad where the lamb was? And Abraham answered him, 'God will provide.' And He did. We see in a few verses down that God provided a ram whose horns were caught in the thicket.
So God is sovereign, and God has provision. The weight of this week has been oppressive, but I know that God is in control and He will provide. Last night He sent me to Psalm 116. Yes, I cried, and no, the weight didn't go away. But I know that He is sovereign, that He will provide, and that He is right here with me as I struggle.
"I love the Lord, because He has heard my voice and my pleas for mercy. Because He inclined His hear to me, therefore I will call on Him as long as I live." ~Psalm 116:1-2
"The counsel of the Lord stands forever, the plans of His heart to all generations." ~Psalm 33:11
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