I received a text from my youngest last night. He was letting us know he has a new cell number. Why? To communicate more easily with staff at his new church. He's had the other phone number since high school. Not a big deal, right?
Ummmm, as I was letting him know I had the new number a sudden surge of tears appeared from -- well I'm not sure from where. All I know is that one minute I'm updating my contact list, and the next minute I have tears falling down my face. Another thing from the past to let go of. Another sign that we're moving on. Another sign that nothing stays the same. Another sign that change is inevitable.
We don't like change. We resist it as much as possible in all areas of our life. Even if we're absolutely miserable we resist change. We get comfortable. We get lazy. We get apathetic. We adopt the attitude that if it ain't broke, don't fix it. And although we would deny it with our very last breath, we like dull routine. It's comfortable and it's safe.
In one of my counseling classes we talked about the fact that the only constant in life is change. And where there is change, there is also grief. Isn't that happy?
Have I mentioned that 2007 was a really rough year? It started spiraling out of control right after we came back from the New Year holiday. And honestly it didn't spiral as much as it just flat out plummeted. Psalm 31 pretty much sums up that year for us. There was change and there was grief. And the grief was so overwhelming that I adopted a heart and face of stone in order to get through it. I was afraid if I ever started crying I would never stop.
And then came 2008. That year started with lots of changes as well. So many that we ended up in Oklahoma. And I still had my heart and face of stone. My armor if you will.
And the last few years God has been pulling away at the scab of 2007. And there's lots of tears to be shed. So many in fact that something as simple as a changed phone number brings tears....
Blessed be the Lord, for He has wondrously shown His steadfast love to me when I was in a besieged city. I had said in my alarm, "I am cut off from Your sight." But You heard the voice of my pleas for mercy when I cried to You for help. Psalm 31:21,22
Wednesday, October 26, 2011
Tuesday, October 18, 2011
Get Yourselves Assembled!!!
Michael and I are in the process of transitioning into a new church family. They have made the transition a little easier by inviting us in. Saturday evening we had dinner with several couples and several 'singles.' The food was really good (homemade chicken pot pie) and the fellowship was sweet. Who can resist dessert when it's called 'Death by Chocolate?' It was rich enough to make your teeth itch.
The facilitators of the group did a great job of directing the conversation and asking pertinent kinds of questions. In other words, we didn't talk about the weather. Several were asked to share their stories about specific times in their lives. It was awesome.
As I sat and listened I was reminded of the great God we serve. They spoke of how God had walked with them through extremely difficult times. They spoke of how God was working around them and through others when they were totally unaware of His presence. They spoke of dear friends who walked through the hard times with them. They spoke of new relationships and how those had been brought about, and they rejoiced in friendships which had weathered the test of time. They spoke of the joy that abounded even during the darkest of days. There were tears and laughter. There was grief, but assurance that one day all will be well. And perhaps most remarkable of all was the gratitude each one felt toward their Father and others.
On a lighter note, one worked for a large drilling company that has a branch in Midland. He told us they always had a difficult time finding people who would transfer to Midland, but once there, they couldn't get them to leave. Hilarious. That speaks well of West Texas -- even though they wondered how in world we had lived there for 30+ years.
There's a reason the author of Hebrews admonishes us not to neglect the assembling of ourselves together. The writer obviously knew that hearing how God is working in the lives of others will encourage and strengthen our relationships with one another and with Him. It's good to hear that He's brought about miraculous things when we feel all alone and He feels far away. It is good to be reminded of how God has worked in our lives and continues to do so. It is good to know we aren't the only ones who struggle. It is good to be reminded that God is faithful, and we can trust Him with all things.
So, next time you get together with friends -- old or new -- ask them what God's been up to in their world. You might be surprised. You will definitely be encouraged.
The facilitators of the group did a great job of directing the conversation and asking pertinent kinds of questions. In other words, we didn't talk about the weather. Several were asked to share their stories about specific times in their lives. It was awesome.
As I sat and listened I was reminded of the great God we serve. They spoke of how God had walked with them through extremely difficult times. They spoke of how God was working around them and through others when they were totally unaware of His presence. They spoke of dear friends who walked through the hard times with them. They spoke of new relationships and how those had been brought about, and they rejoiced in friendships which had weathered the test of time. They spoke of the joy that abounded even during the darkest of days. There were tears and laughter. There was grief, but assurance that one day all will be well. And perhaps most remarkable of all was the gratitude each one felt toward their Father and others.
On a lighter note, one worked for a large drilling company that has a branch in Midland. He told us they always had a difficult time finding people who would transfer to Midland, but once there, they couldn't get them to leave. Hilarious. That speaks well of West Texas -- even though they wondered how in world we had lived there for 30+ years.
There's a reason the author of Hebrews admonishes us not to neglect the assembling of ourselves together. The writer obviously knew that hearing how God is working in the lives of others will encourage and strengthen our relationships with one another and with Him. It's good to hear that He's brought about miraculous things when we feel all alone and He feels far away. It is good to be reminded of how God has worked in our lives and continues to do so. It is good to know we aren't the only ones who struggle. It is good to be reminded that God is faithful, and we can trust Him with all things.
So, next time you get together with friends -- old or new -- ask them what God's been up to in their world. You might be surprised. You will definitely be encouraged.
Monday, October 10, 2011
Grace
When we first moved to Oklahoma we were staying in a two bedroom, fully furnished apartment in Oklahoma City. And the best part was that I wasn't working. It was wonderful. I was able to catch up on some reading and picked up John Piper's book Future Grace. I'm pretty sure there was lots in the book that was way over my head, which is probably why I don't write books and give lectures on doctrine. I don't even know how some one has the question, much less how they get the thought. Alas.
The basic premise is that grace has already been granted, whether it's for now or in the future. We can rest assured in the fact that God is sovereign, and He has made provision for whatever our needs are to come. As our pastor stated yesterday, "We should live expecting future grace because God will already be there." Piper says, "...it is all that God promises to be for us from this second on. Tomorrow's crisis demands tomorrow's grace."
That can be a difficult concept to grasp. We want security, not uncertainty. We judge everything by time. God lives outside of time. The illustration I used with my junior high students was to take a picture and put a small hole in it. I would then ask them to look at the hole/through the hole and describe to us what they could see -- only a very small piece of what was actual reality. If they moved the picture further away from their face, they could see everything. It was all about perspective. God sees the whole picture (and has provided for the whole picture), we just see a small, small speck of the picture. The problem comes when we want to see the whole picture, just like God.
Faith plays a big role in this. In Future Grace Piper states, "Faith is the act of our soul that turns away from our own insufficiency to the free and all-sufficient resources of God. Faith focuses on the freedom of God to dispense grace to the unworthy." Where does faith come from? Romans 10:17 says this, So faith comes from hearing, and hearing through the word of Christ.
Piper also talks about 'grace denied.' We pray to have a safe trip or a good day or perfect health. But then God intervenes and reminds us that it's His way, not ours. Here's where the rubber meets the road isn't it? Here is where we can rest in Him and choose to trust, or we can allow our fear and emotions to rule. Our reaction can be to have a pity party, react in panic, or we can look around during the hard times and see who needs to be blessed by God's all sufficient grace for us. Piper says it like this, "The freest life of love is the life saturated with the confidence that nothing comes to me but what is good for me." I would add that it can also be good for those we come into contact with during that time.
My favorite phrase of the whole book? "His grace may break out anywhere He pleases." Isn't that the best? Love it, love it, love it!
Grace -- God's Riches At Christ's Expense. Such an inadequate definition for such a magnificent gift.
The basic premise is that grace has already been granted, whether it's for now or in the future. We can rest assured in the fact that God is sovereign, and He has made provision for whatever our needs are to come. As our pastor stated yesterday, "We should live expecting future grace because God will already be there." Piper says, "...it is all that God promises to be for us from this second on. Tomorrow's crisis demands tomorrow's grace."
That can be a difficult concept to grasp. We want security, not uncertainty. We judge everything by time. God lives outside of time. The illustration I used with my junior high students was to take a picture and put a small hole in it. I would then ask them to look at the hole/through the hole and describe to us what they could see -- only a very small piece of what was actual reality. If they moved the picture further away from their face, they could see everything. It was all about perspective. God sees the whole picture (and has provided for the whole picture), we just see a small, small speck of the picture. The problem comes when we want to see the whole picture, just like God.
Faith plays a big role in this. In Future Grace Piper states, "Faith is the act of our soul that turns away from our own insufficiency to the free and all-sufficient resources of God. Faith focuses on the freedom of God to dispense grace to the unworthy." Where does faith come from? Romans 10:17 says this, So faith comes from hearing, and hearing through the word of Christ.
Piper also talks about 'grace denied.' We pray to have a safe trip or a good day or perfect health. But then God intervenes and reminds us that it's His way, not ours. Here's where the rubber meets the road isn't it? Here is where we can rest in Him and choose to trust, or we can allow our fear and emotions to rule. Our reaction can be to have a pity party, react in panic, or we can look around during the hard times and see who needs to be blessed by God's all sufficient grace for us. Piper says it like this, "The freest life of love is the life saturated with the confidence that nothing comes to me but what is good for me." I would add that it can also be good for those we come into contact with during that time.
My favorite phrase of the whole book? "His grace may break out anywhere He pleases." Isn't that the best? Love it, love it, love it!
Grace -- God's Riches At Christ's Expense. Such an inadequate definition for such a magnificent gift.
Monday, October 3, 2011
Odessa! It's Spectacular!!!
So as I'm on my way to Odessa Saturday afternoon, I get pulled over by a police officer outside of Wichita Falls. I had already passed him (as he sat on the side of the road), and didn't think much of it. I had my cruise control set to 71. No problem. Except that apparently there was a problem. As I pulled over I looked up and noticed the posted speed limit - 70. Unfortunately, until that point the speed limit was 60. Oops. Somewhere along there I decided the speed limit was already 70. To make a short story shorter, the officer was very kind, and he didn't give me a ticket. He did ask where I was headed. "I'm on my way to Odessa," says me. Says him, "Why in the world are you going to Odessa?!"
I can't tell you how many times I've had that reaction when people find out where I'm from. Usually I just say West Texas, then I don't have to explain or defend my town of origin. And it may as well be my town of origin. We moved to Odessa in March of 1967, when I was in the second grade. And from that time on, with the exception of the three years Mike and I lived in Lubbock, until July of 2008, I have called Odessa home.
I thought about that the rest of the trip. What, if anything, is spectacular about being from Odessa? Surprisingly enough I thought of several things.
Our family moved to Odessa from Seagraves. There were 9 weeks of second grade left. I loved Burleson Elementary School. It was the first time no one cared that I didn't take dance lessons or wear frilly bows with frilly dresses. We could just be friends because we were, not because of what our parents did or didn't do and what extracurricular activities I was involved in or not. There were tons of kids on the street we lived on, and we played as hard as we could until dark every night. That summer was the most fun ever.
We moved again right before school started. Third grade was at Goliad Elementary with Miss Cochrum. She was 12 feet tall with funny hair, but I loved her, as did the rest of my classmates. That year Debbie Thomas became my best friend ever, and we were friends with Kay Glenn, and Melody Baggett, and John Wier, and Stan Strifler, and many more. I learned that year that if you kick boys in the shin it can leave bruises and cuts, and after Stan showed me his the next day I was ashamed of myself and never did that again. Oh yeah, I almost forgot the best part, Gary Snow and I were chosen to represent our class in the Goliad King and Queen event in February. I still have a picture of us grinning from ear to ear, and I was a head taller than him. That changed somewhere in junior high . . . .
And then there was the year that one of my best friends had a crush on Paul Shepherd and so we would sit on the curb at Goliad in front of his house and wait. I'm not really sure what we were waiting on? Maybe Karen knew. : )
While at Goliad I also saw how devastating it was to lose a parent. One of our classmates lost his mother in fourth grade. I remember him being very sad, and I remember being sad for him. I was also scolded by Kay one year because of the way I had treated another classmate. Oh dear me. That's why I love the first Harry Potter book when Neville is awarded points for standing up to his friends. Kay would have earned points.
Then we were off to Hood with different class schedules and new friends and new experiences. I try to forget those years. I had great fun, but I was awful. I embarrass myself when I remember, so I try not to remember.
And then on to Permian where I realized that Mrs. Wier was famous. I thought she was fabulous, but I didn't realize all of Permian High School thought so as well. Permian High School -- home of multiple state football championships, numerous Merit Scholarship Award winners, excellent choral and band programs, and home of Friday Night Lights. Every time I've worn any Permian gear anywhere in the United States people ask me about Permian High School. Every time. They point and whisper. Every time.
And how can you talk about Odessa without mentioning Taco Villa and Rosa's? Is there anyone in Odessa who hasn't grown up eating there? You can always tell when someone is new to the area -- they have no inkling of Taco Villa. Sadness. And of course everyone knows when you move away the first place you stop when you come back through town is Taco Villa. It's a tradition. And may I just add that I learned that work is a good thing from Bobby Cox? He's the only millionaire I've ever known to flip burgers. At Texasburger -- Texasburger when it was still a hole in the wall place on 52nd & Andrews Hwy. Every Sunday night he'd be in the back flipping burgers. Amazing.
The sunsets in West Texas are unequaled anywhere. They are beautiful. There's something about being able to look out and see for miles. It just does a heart good. I've enjoyed having trees and grass and water in Oklahoma, but there are days I long to just see for miles.
And the people in Odessa are 'interesting'. Many are well-educated, others not so much. I've encountered the very wealthy, the very poor, the very moral, and the very immoral. And most of them I would count as friends. And I've learned something from every one of them, rich or poor, educated or not, walking a straight line or well acquainted with the 'under belly' of society. I love that about Odessa. And yes, I must confess that I always make fun of Junior Leaguers. Sorry ladies, I know you do great things, my foster families benefited from many of your projects.
Oh, and there's a giant jack rabbit, whose name is Jack.
So why am I headed to Odessa? Well, heck, because there's some spectacular things there!
I can't tell you how many times I've had that reaction when people find out where I'm from. Usually I just say West Texas, then I don't have to explain or defend my town of origin. And it may as well be my town of origin. We moved to Odessa in March of 1967, when I was in the second grade. And from that time on, with the exception of the three years Mike and I lived in Lubbock, until July of 2008, I have called Odessa home.
I thought about that the rest of the trip. What, if anything, is spectacular about being from Odessa? Surprisingly enough I thought of several things.
Our family moved to Odessa from Seagraves. There were 9 weeks of second grade left. I loved Burleson Elementary School. It was the first time no one cared that I didn't take dance lessons or wear frilly bows with frilly dresses. We could just be friends because we were, not because of what our parents did or didn't do and what extracurricular activities I was involved in or not. There were tons of kids on the street we lived on, and we played as hard as we could until dark every night. That summer was the most fun ever.
We moved again right before school started. Third grade was at Goliad Elementary with Miss Cochrum. She was 12 feet tall with funny hair, but I loved her, as did the rest of my classmates. That year Debbie Thomas became my best friend ever, and we were friends with Kay Glenn, and Melody Baggett, and John Wier, and Stan Strifler, and many more. I learned that year that if you kick boys in the shin it can leave bruises and cuts, and after Stan showed me his the next day I was ashamed of myself and never did that again. Oh yeah, I almost forgot the best part, Gary Snow and I were chosen to represent our class in the Goliad King and Queen event in February. I still have a picture of us grinning from ear to ear, and I was a head taller than him. That changed somewhere in junior high . . . .
And then there was the year that one of my best friends had a crush on Paul Shepherd and so we would sit on the curb at Goliad in front of his house and wait. I'm not really sure what we were waiting on? Maybe Karen knew. : )
While at Goliad I also saw how devastating it was to lose a parent. One of our classmates lost his mother in fourth grade. I remember him being very sad, and I remember being sad for him. I was also scolded by Kay one year because of the way I had treated another classmate. Oh dear me. That's why I love the first Harry Potter book when Neville is awarded points for standing up to his friends. Kay would have earned points.
Then we were off to Hood with different class schedules and new friends and new experiences. I try to forget those years. I had great fun, but I was awful. I embarrass myself when I remember, so I try not to remember.
And then on to Permian where I realized that Mrs. Wier was famous. I thought she was fabulous, but I didn't realize all of Permian High School thought so as well. Permian High School -- home of multiple state football championships, numerous Merit Scholarship Award winners, excellent choral and band programs, and home of Friday Night Lights. Every time I've worn any Permian gear anywhere in the United States people ask me about Permian High School. Every time. They point and whisper. Every time.
And how can you talk about Odessa without mentioning Taco Villa and Rosa's? Is there anyone in Odessa who hasn't grown up eating there? You can always tell when someone is new to the area -- they have no inkling of Taco Villa. Sadness. And of course everyone knows when you move away the first place you stop when you come back through town is Taco Villa. It's a tradition. And may I just add that I learned that work is a good thing from Bobby Cox? He's the only millionaire I've ever known to flip burgers. At Texasburger -- Texasburger when it was still a hole in the wall place on 52nd & Andrews Hwy. Every Sunday night he'd be in the back flipping burgers. Amazing.
The sunsets in West Texas are unequaled anywhere. They are beautiful. There's something about being able to look out and see for miles. It just does a heart good. I've enjoyed having trees and grass and water in Oklahoma, but there are days I long to just see for miles.
And the people in Odessa are 'interesting'. Many are well-educated, others not so much. I've encountered the very wealthy, the very poor, the very moral, and the very immoral. And most of them I would count as friends. And I've learned something from every one of them, rich or poor, educated or not, walking a straight line or well acquainted with the 'under belly' of society. I love that about Odessa. And yes, I must confess that I always make fun of Junior Leaguers. Sorry ladies, I know you do great things, my foster families benefited from many of your projects.
Oh, and there's a giant jack rabbit, whose name is Jack.
So why am I headed to Odessa? Well, heck, because there's some spectacular things there!
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